A few years back, Queen Elizabeth hosted a reception in London for the leaders of the G7. As they all posed for a group photo, the mood was a little serious. As you can see in this video, the Queen quips, “Are you supposed to be looking as if you are enjoying yourself?” and the leaders’ laughter is immediate. What the Queen did was break the tension and lighten the moment with a few words of humour.
A well-developed sense of humour plays a surprisingly serious role in effective leadership. Leaders who know how to be appropriately humorous are seen as likeable, intelligent and motivating. Bringing humour into a room has other benefits too. It is associated with a reduction in cortisol, a stress hormone, and an increase in dopamine and serotonin, two chemicals important for mood regulation. This leads to positive effects such as reduced stress levels, greater focus and even resilience after a stressful situation.
Here are a few ways you can bring humour into your workplace interactions (with examples):
- Acknowledge the realities of our lives in a light way.
» “Let us keep this meeting short. I know your calendars look more like Christmas trees at night than anything else.”
» “Don't you feel that after some family vacations, we need a vacation?” - Poke fun at yourself.
» “My idea was excellent before I said it aloud.”
» “I am so forgetful that I searched for my glasses last week while wearing them!” - Make light of another person’s choice of words, in a gentle way.
» Looking for seats to empty at an outdoor lunch we’d gone to, a lady stood behind our chairs and told her friend “Let’s wait here. This section looks shady.” I protested with a mock serious expression, “Wow. You don’t even know us.” This made everyone laugh. - Use analogies and metaphors in unexpected ways.
» "Some of the challenges we’ll discuss today might feel like a jigsaw puzzle… but the good news is, we’ve already got most of the edge pieces in place!"
» “Mistakes are like tuition fees. This one wasn’t cheap but it was educational.” - Call out what everyone is thinking, with a smile.
» On seeing a particularly complicated PowerPoint slide in Afghanistan, U.S. Gen. Stanley A. McChrystal remarked, “When we understand that slide, we’ll have won the war.”
» When a decision is being postponed repeatedly – “This topic has remarkable staying power.” - Use playful exaggeration, but without blame.
» “We have discussed these ground rules, perhaps only a million times.”
» “We have not fallen behind; we have merely taken the scenic route in this project.” - Personify tools, technologies and processes.
» “Looks like my laptop is ready for the weekend.”
» “Our review process is so advanced, it takes a couple of extra days to reflect.”
» “Who knew? LLMs are just as natural as humans at making things up.”
Need I add that humour in the workplace should be appropriate? Your humour’s aim is to reduce tension, not increase it. Bawdy jokes or personal digs will usually land awkwardly and us in trouble with HR. If you work across cultures, prefer understatement to sarcasm. Your words themselves may matter less than the tone and smile with which you deliver them.
Humour is an underrated leadership trait that demonstrates emotional competence and presence of mind. Effective leaders know that humour isn’t really about jokes but about human moments. They use humour in the right way at the right time to reduce tension, increase psychological safety, put things into perspective and build connection.
How have you used humour to defuse a tense moment or make an inherently stressful situation a little lighter? I would love to hear your examples. Wishing you a great year ahead filled with success and smiles.
Ravi, thank you for sharing this. It’s a timely reminder that leadership doesn’t always need a drumroll—sometimes it just needs a raised eyebrow and a well-timed line. The Queen’s quip works so well because it rises above the moment, never landing on anyone personally. That’s classic, enduring wit: light, inclusive, and disarming.
If I may add a gentle counterpoint—humour is indeed a wonderful release in tense rooms, but only when it eases the atmosphere rather than singling people out. At times, what’s intended as “just a joke” can drift into something more personal, and the laughter that follows can feel polite rather than genuine. In those moments, humour loses its healing power.
There’s an important distinction between laughing with the room and laughing at someone in it. The former strengthens trust and connection; the latter can quietly chip away at it. Self-deprecating humour tends to be generous. Observational humour is often safe ground. Humour that feels pointed—even unintentionally—requires more care.
I especially appreciate your emphasis that humour isn’t really about jokes, but about human moments. I’d add that it’s also about judgment and restraint. Not every thought needs a punchline, and not every pause needs to be filled. Sometimes, knowing when not to be funny is a mark of maturity in leadership.
So yes, bring the wit, the metaphors, the gentle exaggeration. Let humour act as a lamp that brightens the room, not a spotlight that makes anyone uncomfortable. When people walk away feeling lighter and more connected, humour has done its job well.
Thank you for prompting this thoughtful reflection. 🙂
Very good point Sharika – humor should be safe, not at someone.
Thanks Ravi.
All through my life, one of the easiest ways has been my name.
“I know it looks backwards but Paul is the surname. I should have had Mr as my first name.”
Humour breaks the ice but also shows confidence in one’s self, which is essential in business and life.
When I am at the head of the table, I pretend to hear the mind voice of others. I think they have an view which is opposite to mine and a bit shy to share. So, I say this is what the other person thinks, which is diametrically opposite to mine. The person protests mildly saying they didn’t have an opposite view. It is a bit of banter. The mood becomes lights. I often break the monotony in this fashion.
Thanks Ravi. This is a topic close to my heart as I truly believe Humour is a highly underrated leadership trait.
Few examples:
When anyone came a little late for an official meeting, my boss used to quip in a lighter tone ” Hi looks like you are too early for the next meeting”.
And several years ago, in a HR meeting regarding pay hike, bonus etc., when HR repeatedly kept dwelling on Income tax related issues (which was not the main topic and , many of us were not really interested) one of us said “You seem to be worried about Income Tax, whereas many of us are worried about income itself (pay hike, bonus etc.) thereby forcing the discussion towards the key topic. A well-developed sense of humour is a great asset. Thanks again.
Isn’t that a key ingredient in keeping the leaders balanced in their stress levels….👍
Very well said Ravi.
You have very effectively shown that humor isn’t always frivolous and needs to be a part of business behavior repertoire. It actually does show emotional maturity and intelligence.
As always, enjoyed your writing.
Nice article Ravi. Humor is often lost in the rush and this is a nice little article to nudge us back.
Today’s generation’s approach to work and career as a whole is lot different (actually I like it). On the other hand, we as leaders have been groomed through time with very different team dynamics and experiences. In a such an environment, it is only natural to see misalignments of team’s work expectations. Humor could be a great leveler and sometimes even the only solution to get the team on track.
Great write-up, Ravi.
Reminds me of an experience I once had while carrying a birthday cake for a teammate in an elevator. The MIS Director who stepped in smiled and asked, “Can I help you?” 🙂