A few years ago, a bunch of us went down from our office in a tech park to the food-court to have lunch. As I was about to commence my lunch of a meat biriyani, a senior colleague looked at me from across the table and rather loudly said, “Ravi Bhuthapuri, are you eating a dead animal?” While this question caught me by surprise, I am glad I was not triggered too much and was thus able to stay in control of my emotions. I said calmly, to approving looks from others at the table, “Oh, I certainly hope so.”
While it is true that leaders need to have a bias for communication, it is perhaps more important to know when to stay silent. As a leader, you may have to also steer the conversation away from certain “hot-button” topics. In a professional workplace, these are topics generally best avoided to maintain a respectful, inclusive, and productive environment. Here are some of them:
- Politics: Political views are often deeply held and can lead to strong disagreements that may create division or discomfort.
- Religion: Religious beliefs are personal and can be sensitive; discussing them at work can risk offending or isolating others, especially in a diverse team.
- Personal finances: Talking about salaries, debts, or financial struggles can lead to discomfort, comparisons, or jealousy among coworkers.
- Personal life choices: This includes sexual orientation, gender identity, relationship status, family planning and diet (see above example). Bringing any of these up in a conversation can feel intrusive, judgmental or inappropriate in a professional setting.
- Personal health issues: While it is okay to seek to understand health-related absences in your team, detailed health discussions can be uncomfortable for others and sometimes inappropriate, especially around sensitive conditions.
- Controversial news events: Hot-button news stories, especially those involving tragedy, violence, or high controversy, can evoke strong emotions and may distract from work.
- Gossip: While some amount of appropriate grapevine talk has its value, speculating about coworkers' personal lives or situations can damage reputations and create a negative workplace environment.
Keeping conversations respectful, inclusive, and work-focused promotes a healthy workplace culture. Generally, if a topic could make someone uncomfortable, it is a good idea to steer clear. I want to add that steering clear does not mean that we are being anything less than authentic. It only means that we are keeping our private thoughts private. We are also letting others know that we are being professional and that we want others to do the same.
What are your thoughts? Have you a relevant personal anecdote you would like to share in the comments section below? I would love to hear from you.